Real Christian Love

Love is often trivialized, politicized, and scandalized today. For years, I was reluctant to say much about love, either in my sermons or in my writings. In recent years, however, as I have come into contact more and more with the lonely, the broken, and the struggling, I have had to think more deeply about love. Perhaps some of my own recent experiences have led to a new awareness of the universal need for love. I wrote down some thoughts about love some time ago. I submit them here for the consideration of the readers of this blog, with some revision. If you think they have merit, I would be pleased for you to comment, distribute, and use in any way that seems helpful. Real Christian love is that which loves in spite of anything it might ever discover about the object of the love. No matter what we may find out about another person we love, we continue in our love. That doesn't mean that we agree with everything that person has ever done or that we excuse everything that person mayhave done; but still, we love. It means that we also allow ourselves to be vulnerable. There will be times when real Christian love demands that we reveal more of ourselves than is comfortable for us, more than we anticipated. It will require trusting someone and allowing for the possibility of being hurt. Real Christian love does not require us to arrive at easy compromises with those with whom we disagree just to preserve an appearance of unity. Rather, real Christian love requires us to face our disagreements honestly, be open to change, but stand by our principles if we remain unconvinced, allow the other person the freedom to do the same, and leave the discussion or decision with a sense of genuine love for the one with whom we have differences. Real Christian love requires reaching out to those who are different, not with pity or condescension, but with genuine love and compassion. We are eager to perform acts of kindness and show real love to those with disabilities and those from different racial, educational, or economic groups and classes. Real Christian love requires genuine intimacy in the highest sense. It means that we will share a meaningful fellowship and truly get to know one another. We will share in pain and sorrow; and we will often share at the very deepest levels of human need and emotion. There will be lots of hugs, lots of tears, lots of laughter, lots of friendly, warm chatter that will say to one another, "You are family." Real Christian love will give us the power and the courage to say to others, even beyond spouse or relatives, "I love you." It is no burden to answer a call in the middle of the night to give comfort or consolation to someone when it is done in real Christian love. It is a privilege to weep with someone about whom you care deeply, when it is done in real Christian love. It is also a delight to rejoice and laugh together when real Christian love is at the center of the relationship. Issues of life and death, of spiritual well-being, and of the most intense and personal struggles can be discussed and our greatest fears verbalized with that dear friend. Everyone needs to know the cherished joy and manifold blessings of real Christian love, though very few will admit the emptiness, desperation, and loneliness that come with a life without love. Real Christian love is not just that experience we share with wife or husband, or parent, or child. It should be that kind of relationship we experience with more and more of those we know in our churches and in our world. I would challenge anyone reading this to reach out to someone and extend a warm embrace of real Christian love. Be open to the leading of God as you seek to show the love of Christ to a human being in need of your caring.